By Heart
The Tango of Seduction
Workshop for women
with Margarita Steinberg
Seduction in action, not 'seduction inaction'
"Seduction in relationships or as an empowerment technique? Or both?"
This is the question people ask me almost immediately after seeing the title of the workshop. :)

My answer is invariably: BOTH.
Seduction involves relating (more on rehabilitating the word 'seduction' later).

If we can play our part in that relating skilfully, that is tremendously empowering.

Ask yourself:
Is it better to seduce or be seduced?

Does sexual liberation automatically
bring savvy and confidence?
Seduction is most fun when it's mutual. It is time women had a place to talk together and learn together about seduction in all its guises. We need to be able to talk about seduction frankly and supportively, and to learn and share powerful and healthy ways of participating. This inclusive workshop sets out to do just that, welcoming women participants of all types and stripes.

Discover how to playfully lead in the game of seduction without any manipulative moves. Reclaim your power to act, to have an active role, in any seduction scenario.
Experience the Essence of Seduction
We spend so much time, effort and money trying to bring the playfulness and joy of seduction into our lives, and yet so often WE DON'T GET THE RESULTS THAT WE WANT.

We get the results that aren't quite what we expected.

What else to try? Where else to turn?
Read on!
We must get behind the wheels of our own lives, whoever we are.
Julian Fellowes, creator of Downton Abbey
Imagine this
You know what you're doing
You catch sight of someone who is an attractive proposition (like you!). This might be someone completely new to you, or your partner of ten years, or anything in between. :)

You know how to
  • catch their attention
  • draw them closer, subtly
  • step closer yourself, gently
  • pace the process so it's comfortable
  • entice without giving too much away
      You feel at ease
      Knowing what you're doing, you feel at ease. No more straining to play seduction like a charade, no more contemplating ridiculous-not-sexy outfits, no more feeling that seduction is for someone else who drew the lucky ticket in the lottery of life.
      The game is fun, because you know how to play it
      Knowing what you're doing, you can tell what the person opposite you is doing, ball-park. You feel at ease because you're not baffled by the games some people play. You get the game now. The game is fun when you know how to play!
      Seduction is something YOU DO
      Seduction in action
      I am keen to rehabilitate the word 'seduction'. People use it to mean lots of different things, often things that are far removed from what is inherent in the word itself.

      The word 'seduction' came into English from Italian. It is made up of two elements:
      'se' (meaning 'self') + 'duce' (which means 'to lead').

      This points to seduction having little to do with what you look like, and a lot more to do with your intention to guide your playmate (for a minute or a lifetime) to you.


      It relies on communication skills and relating skills. Skills are things you do. Skills are things you can learn to do.

      Discover how to lead, invite people towards you, and how to enjoy the ride!
      As if it were a crime
      There are Sex Tips out there in every newsagents now.

      Even so, it can feel like a crime to devote time to learning about seduction proper, the process of mutual wooing.

      Women have been confronting the existing imbalances in earning power, the imbalances in parental responsibilities. We are making strides forward.

      At the same time, it is still a challenge for a lot of women to turn up as consorts to meet their partners on an equal footing. The word 'consort' means 'mate' or 'playmate'. It makes sense for us to give ourselves permission to learn to play deftly, expertly, elegantly.
      The Tango of Seduction
      This workshop's original title was 'The Tango of Seduction'.

      In response, lots of people told me to leave the word 'seduction' out of the title of this event, it suggested something sexual. 'Empowerment' would be better, less controversial.

      People also told me to leave out the word 'Tango'. It brings with it a whiff of Strictly, and so many clichés. Imagine, though, that you could leave those clichés behind, and take it from me that Tango instead is a subtle and intimate dance, an interaction between people, an exchange between a leader and a leader, if you like. It is a superb metaphor for exploring what happens when people are interacting.

      This workshop will explore seduction, in the broadest sense of the word, through discussion and movement. You won't have to make physical contact with anyone, and you won't need to display your sensuality. We will use gesture and moving around other people, as you do in everyday life.
      Book tickets
      a superb metaphor for exploring what happens
      when people are interacting
      Warrior Princess
      You now know how this workshop came to be billed as 'Seduction in a cold climate'. The warnings against using words for what they mean began to feel oppressive to me.

      To learn this stuff in the first place, I had had to rebel against repression and GET CLEAR-SIGHTED on my own behalf.

      To bring it to you, I had to rebel again against the 'cold climate' out there hushing down straight talk about a fuller take on enticement, seduction, this whole part of our lives.
      For you
      This workshop is for you if
      these ring TRUE FOR YOU
      The real thing, please
      I am sick of what passes for a discussion on seduction out there, the simpering, the tropes, the slight-of-hand that Cosmo plays every month by telling me yet another 39 ways to please a man...
      Call a spade a spade
      I am DONE feeling like a child from whom the grown-ups have been concealing what really goes down. I know that there is no sharp divide between 'sexual' and 'pure'. I know that hints of 'sexual' are woven into everything all day long, and I'm not afraid. Call it 'seduction', call it 'influence', call a spade a spade.
      All the flavours
      I can see that there is more subtlety to human interactions than the language of 'pick ups' and 'get them into bed' acknowledges. I want the full hog, the subtlest and the most overt, all the flavours.
      "I'll have what she's having"
      I've had enough of watching someone else apparently have a better time with this stuff than me and wondering "WHAT'S HER SECRET?"
      I can take the lead
      I'd rather be an active participant in the game of seduction unfolding all around me (whether I call it that or not) than play the inhibited role, hoping someone else will do all the heavy lifting for me.
      I claim MY POWER
      I know that playing 'innocent' lets me blame someone else - and that I can't have excuses and progress at the same time. If I abdicate my power, someone else will choose for me.
      I want the 'SECRET' CODE of seduction
      I want to know the 'secret' of how to read what is going on between people and how I can step in and play it my way.
      I have the power to CHOOSE
      I choose to know how to summon, beckon, make contact. How to take a step towards, how to take a step back. How to guide which way an interaction goes, subtly, without manipulation. How to choose.
      The Tango of Seduction
      The Tango of Seduction
      a blueprint for seductive fun for the rest of your life
      This hands-on, on-your-feet workshop explores seduction through discussion and movement, revealing the key elements of any seduction:
      autonomy <> connection <> proximity
        Get in touch if you have any questions

        Empowerment in general without empowerment in the sexual arena is like a bird with one wing.

        How many women do you know who are struggling to steer this part of their lives in an empowered way? Perhaps you, too, have found it tricky at times to see through some of the complex stuff that goes on, and have felt on the back foot faced with the savvier players of your preferred gender.

        As soon as they reach puberty, girls are faced with the entire male population, of every age and level of sexual and dating experience. This brings a massive pressure with it! And that's at a time when they are only beginning to explore their own sexuality.

        Not every woman comes out of that crucible poised and serene. And even those who manage to navigate their early outings in this domain relatively unscathed do not magically end up with a full toolbox, especially if there is dearth of clear-sighted guidance available to them.

        THIS STUFF MATTERS. Seduction matters. It is a big part of our lives. Those who ask that it is kept hush-hush, low-key, probably mean well. If the result of the silence is you left to figure this potent aspect of your life alone, then the silence is not so innocent, after all.
        Empowerment for women
        All women
        Workshop for women of all types and stripes
        Empowering women in the spirit of sisterhood
        Small groups to ensure individual attention
        Meeting as women
        This inclusive workshop welcomes women participants of all types and stripes
        This topic is sensitive for all of us. The workshop addresses it with a spirit of respectful enquiry, honouring our vulnerability - and still daring to face and acknowledge what's real in our world.
        Seduction is relevant to women of all backgrounds and orientations. The fundamental dynamics of seduction apply everywhere. The format of this workshop is flexible, so you can apply the insights into the "base code" of seduction to your own context.
        The workshop involves discussion and some work with gesture and movement that illustrate initiating contact with people and pacing an interaction. The workshop will NOT be inviting you to exchange innuendo or display your sensuality; participants will be expected to respect each other's boundaries. We will be exploring what sets the scene for seductive fun, for you to take with you into your life.
        Seduction in ACTION
        In case you were wondering
        Q&A time
        What's different about what you do?
        A lot of what's out there falls into two camps:
        > Sex tips and variations
        > Inner Sex Goddess, tantra-style work, aimed at helping you tune into your sensuality

        I believe both of these have their value. And it's a sign of progress that they are out there and readily available.

        However, I DON'T BELIEVE that either of them go to the heart of the matter. I know lots of women who baulk at the Inner Sex Goddess stuff. What I am bringing to you is the most straightforward, accessible, plain-talking approach that de-mystifies seduction and the dynamics involved.
        Is seduction something I can learn?
        You have learnt many things in your life already. You've mastered walking and talking. Seduction is complex, for sure. It's less complicated than walking and talking, though.

        I had to learn about seduction as a grown-up, from reading, observing, making mistakes. I had to learn, because I WAS REALLY BAD AT IT. I fell for the wrong guys (because they took care of making all the moves). I didn't have women around me who could guide me, so I had to learn for myself. This year I am celebrating five stupendous years with a fantastic man, and I feel delighted at having learnt how I can create a wonderful vibrant dance of seduction that keeps us both grinning. (😉 )
        Is seduction something you can teach?
        In a word, YES.

        Here are the three main reasons why I can teach you the principles of seduction:
        • I have had to learn it myself, so I know first-hand what it's like and what every stage of the learning curve involves.
        • I am a qualified and experienced teacher and coach, and a published author on teaching best practice.
        • To help you learn, I have a unique learning format, originally developed for teaching collaborative improvisation to dancers of Argentine Tango. You learn from your own experiences, in a supported and guided way.

        I have a successful track record in mentoring women on dating and intimate relationships, and that's how I KNOW THIS WORKS!
        Seduction in a cold climate
        Let the good times roll!
        Margarita Steinberg
        Margarita is a qualified Psychosynthesis Leadership Coach, and brings to her work a kaleidoscope of skills and experience: in teaching & training, creativity, counselling, psychology, language, career guidance and Life Design, and holistic health and spiritual practice.

        Meet Margarita
        Margarita Steinberg
        Margarita is a qualified Psychosynthesis Leadership Coach, and brings to her work a kaleidoscope of skills and experience: in teaching & training, creativity, counselling, psychology, language, career guidance and Life Design, and holistic health and spiritual practice.

        Meet Margarita