By Heart Blog
Yes thank you
Welcome in good things coming your way
Are you poised to welcome in good things coming your way?
All good things are brought to you by people.
The Barefoot Doctor, aka Stephen Russell
Before we begin, I'd like to invite you to pause for 5 seconds, and check:

Over the last week, were there any offers of assistance, or pointers on what could take you towards what you want, that you swiftly dismissed because such good fortune would be too good to be true, or maybe because accepting such generosity would be unseemly?
Before we begin, I'd like to invite you to pause for 5 seconds, and check:

Over the last week, were there any offers of assistance, or pointers on what could take you towards what you want, that you swiftly dismissed because such good fortune would be too good to be true, or maybe because accepting such generosity would be unseemly?
Sometimes, people are ready to accept contributions in one part of their life, but would resist the same in another. Check: perhaps you trust your friends to be willing to act for your benefit, but would be reluctant to imagine that a colleague could be equally generous?

The moments when you waved off good things that were coming your way may suddenly stand out to you in vivid detail, even though the whole exchange lasted only seconds at the time.

If so, it's time for a change.

I often suggest this practice to clients:
Install 'Yes thank you' as the default answer to offers extended to you that you have no sound cause to suspect of being suspect.
As evidence for how powerful this practice is let me tell you that, as I was scribbling the first draft of this blog post, a colleague walked by and swiftly returned with the gift of a book he'd brought in specially, inspired by our previous conversation. Even sitting silently writing this stuff resulted in an opportunity for me to practice saying, as I recommend to you, 'Yes thank you, how kind!'
YES THANK YOU
Changing a habit generally goes through three stages.

Be kind to yourself as you make the effort to change a habit.
Three stages of changing a habit
(I've included a pre- and a post- state, totalling five stages in all)

  1. You recognise the opportunity after the event. D'oh! This is the warm-up phase. Every time you recognise an opportunity in retrospect, congratulate yourself, because you're getting better at spotting them.

  2. You stop yourself mid-sentence, because you're just heard yourself turning down something wonderful / helpful.

  3. You hear yourself *about* to turn down something helpful / wonderful, and replace what you were about to say with your new default welcome: 'Yes, thank you'.

  4. You start to see opportunities coming (rather than once they begin to slip away) and are ready to embrace them.

  5. The new default has taken root, and it's now normal for you to embrace kindness and generosity flowing towards you. You genuinely enjoy and appreciate it as the regular way that things happen in your world.
May many great things get brought to you by the people around you over the next nine days.
If you take up this practice, I'd love to hear what good things you are now able to welcome in.

Drop me a line!
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Margarita Steinberg

I am a Leadership Coach with a specialism in Psychosynthesis psychology. I am the founder of ByHeart Coaching, and this blog grows out of my coaching work. I am also a qualified and experienced teacher, and draw on training in counselling skills.

I work with individuals and couples, as private clients; I also work with organisations through running leadership coaching programmes and group workshops.


PUBLICATIONS
A chapter on my innovative learning format using embodied learning appears in the book 'Disrupting traditional pedagogy: Active Learning in Practice' published by University of Sussex Press in June 2019.

In preparation: my first book 'One step at a time: how to thrive in a dynamic world'

Find out more about my work
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ByHeart blog
I write about my clients' stories, about coaching and psychology, current events and the human condition
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ByHeart Blog
I write about my clients' stories, about coaching and psychology, current events and the human condition
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Subscribe to our mailing list to receive alerts about upcoming blog posts, offers and events
client stories
The proof is in the pudding
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